I’ve been reflecting and questioning my calling for sometime now – the results of self reflection are amazing! Self reflection causes you to remember things you wanted to forget, as well as things you don’t want to face about yourself. Over the past few weeks as I’ve reflected, prayed and questioned I was reminded of my initial sense of call which was to community development, I wanted to work in impoverished communities serving in ways that caused change and created opportunities for community members to grow – I wanted to do it all without the church! I also did not want to work with children. Since my initial sense of call I’ve visited Helena, Arkansas (a place close to my heart) three times with a different church each time, along with many other mission experiences. I’ve served as a children’s ministry intern, youth minister, college ministry intern, as well as, after school ministry and youth leadership coordinator, notice all of the roles I’ve served in up to this point have involved congregational faith communities and children. I find it fascinating that my sense of call was almost correct, I found ways to serve the impoverished in the communities I’ve lived in and communities far away, however I’ve done it all while impacting children and I love congregational ministry. While I must admit, my stubbornness to not work with children and my yielding to the spirit of God has clashed at times and continues to clash, but I like to thing the clashing is more graceful now. Without a doubt I can look back and say I’m grateful for the places I’ve served and how those various capacities have allowed me to see the kingdom of God through many lenses and sometimes those lenses have been scratched, cracked, and blurry.